78 Midnight Howls

Communication of any kind is important but in relationships especially, communication holds a great wight. In my opinion communication represents exchange of thought, emotion and energy. Because we identify communication mostly as speech we tend to close other comunication paths of. 

 Communicate every day                             

I cannot praise enough about communicating every single day. Have that five minute talk if that is all the tme you have in a day.  Is  something that your partner said bothering you. Ask them why they said that, and then explore why did you get hurt by what they said. Express to them that you felt hurt. Allow them to express aswell. It's important that mutual communication occurs. As I said before don't expect someone to read your mind. I think that a big part of communication is vulnerability. Being vulnerable enought to express. Being vulnerable enough to empathise and understand.

Say what you mean,  mean what you say                                                                                              I think that a lot of us don't say things as they are, for alot of different reasons. But when it comes to dealing with stuff there is nothing more unhelpful than sugar coating things. Sometimes you just need a kick in the ass. Getting real with yourself and with person your in relationship with. You have to get to the point of things eventually, and why make it a strugle for yourself. Sometimes saying the truth feels like hurting and it can be, I don't say that it isn't. But  that harsh truth can give us the push we need to make some change, and  move things around.  

No words just actions                                                                                                             Expressing what you think or feel through actions can have even greater impact than expressing those same thoughts and emotions through speach. Sometimes it's enough to hug someone instead of telling them 'I love you'. What happens a lot is that people have tough time expressing their emotions physically. And quite often when that happens in relationships you'll have a partner who assumes you don't care for them. This happens because of difference in love language and lack of communication. For this reason I want you to explore 5 love languages.  Communication through actions adds to the level of connectin to oneself and other people. 

Hello love, want to find love this valentine's day right ? So where do you start. First place that I would search is yourself. You can only ever find true love for others if you first find true love for yourself. Now that sounds so easy right ? If you've ever researched about this topic of  self love, you'll know that it can be tricky and complicated. I decided to make it easy for you, at least make the beginging easy so you can slip into this shues of self love as easely as possible. First we have to determine what we are searching for, and that is love.

Love is the highest vibration there is. From Sources perspective love is the highest vibration there is. And therefore Source holds that highest vibration, and in esence is that love vibration. 

Word love is used for  such a plethora of things, it's normal we get confused about it. It can be the word used to represent feeling states, attitudes, pleasures, or strong affections felt for any number of things from romantic attachments to sexual attachments to platonic attachments.  In esence love is as simple as it can be, but we have made it complicated to ourselves. Right now I want you to make love simple, understandable and achievable to yourself.

The idea of 5 love languages  comes from Dr. Gary Chapman  who's marriage counselor and director of marriage seminars.  5 love languages are basicly groups in which each one of us fals as a love being.  Understanding your love language and  love language of people in your life could reveal  love in places you didn't think love exsisted.

Besides  exploring  feelings of love, we have many more emotions that we explore. Those emotions are our signals as to what is happening in our mind. They can be used a s guides to our happines and if ignored to our unhappiness aswell. We will be following emotions in order to get to where we want to go. Our emotions express themselves through manny different ways. Your task will be finding out how you experience emotions in your body and psyche.  If your intune with yourself you probably know how your emotions feel. But for alot of us, we find it hard to diiscover just how our emotions actually feel in our body. So I want you to explore ways in which you can sense your emotions.

There has a been a over praise about journaling. Well good things are always the most popular, right? There is no such thing as taking a peace of paper and a pen and a just spilling your guts out. No matter which way you record your thoughts and emotions   you will get same results, the important  things is that you do actually record them. You may choose to tape yourself on a phone or your compuer, go crazy do what resonates with you.  What I would recommend is that you try to record yourslef at least once a day or if you can do it, twice. First thing in the morning and the last thing at night.  Here are some suggested questions you can answer at each season:

Morning: How do I feel ? What do I want to accomplish today ?  What are three things that I can do today that will make me happy today?

Evening:  How did my day go? How do I feel about today? What did I accomplish today?  Things that I'm grateful for about today?  How did love show up in my life today? 

Be present with you emotions

Be present with your emotions, sounds real easy right? Well it can be bloody hard at first. But once you start, you will feel refreshed and lighter and more inspired.  This is a process that requires your full commitment.  Right here and now I will give you an exercise that you can do right away. Give this exercise a shot every day if you can.

First I want you to close your eyes and relax. You can get into meditation pose,  you can stand, lay down or whatever works for you.  I want you to be as still as possible. Let yourself be open to anything that comes to you, try not to engage with any thoughts that come to you. 

One thing that helped me was imagining your thoughts to be clouds on the sky and you allowing them to flow and just observing them. Or imagining that your thoughts are leaves floating on a river stream and your are bserving them pass by you. Make sure that if you get any sensations or emotions in your body you remember them for latter. Pay attention to feelings that rise up and how your body responds to them. Don't try to change them just allow them to be there. 

If your ego starts giving you thoughts repeat the first part of releasing emotioins into clouds or them being leaves on a river stream. Once you think you have done enought of  this work open your eyes. 

If you want you can check how has your mood and emotion changed or shifted.  This will clarify your senses and with practice you will be able to recognize you emotions and thus follow what suits you best.

Other thing you can do to keep track of your emotions is write in your jurnal. You can check  a bit that I have writen on journaling  int his little bundle of joy.

Shadow work is something that can not be unacknowledged. Shadow work has become an essential part of self exploration. Eaven do it is feared  by many it holds an important place in our lives.  Shadow work has become a stigmatised thing in todays world.  In all it's simplicity shadow work is a proces of bringing unconscious into the light of conscious. You will find that there are many ideas and thereby, many tecniques that can be used.  I will be sharing some tips and tricks from my favoirite teachers in this feald in seperate blog post.  Some simple things that you can do or use, as a part of your shadow work may include universally  known journal work, meditations, 

Intentional decision making, Pattern discovery, Tarot cards, oracle cards, rituals…

If you are or a planning to be in relationship and you recognize a pattern that is happening in every relationship you are in, I want you to do this. 

Get yourself into a position that is comfortable and close your eyes. Now allow that pattern to play like a movie in front of you. See what emotions, sensations or thoughts come up and note them somewhere after your done, or have someone with you who will write all that is happening. See the parts of pattern you may have not seen untill now and acknowledge them. See what emotions rise up and  how they feel in your body how do they come into play, question them.  

What does this emotion mean to me? How does this emotion feel in my body ? What thoughts does this emotion cause me to think? Exc… Do the same with any thoughts and sensation in your body.

Some of the most powerful questions you can ask yourself are:

What  emotions is this experience  causing  me to feel ?

What thoughts is this experience causing me to think ?

What does this expereince mean to me ?

What is the positive intention behind this (negative) experience?

There is much more you can explore, this is only a starter in this feald, something to explain what shadow work is and a start for you. I would recomend exploring some more information before you start with shadow work. It can be tricky and at times it will be difficult and  it is best you know what you are signing up for.  You will find that ego can sometimes be a big block just beacuse of how it's designed and beacuse of it's purpose, that is something you explore aswell.

 

One thing that I've included in journaling area is gratitude practice. Journaling can be included as place to express your gratitude.  One of the things that you can do is a love letter to self.  I will be including one of my personal love letters  at the end of this peace. Writing a love letter is terapeutic and freeing. Declare love to yourself, declare gratitude to appreciation. 

 Other exercise I want to present you with is gratitude  reflection. Every time you go by a miror I want you to find one thing that you think is great about you. Something you are gratefull you have on yur body. Is it your eyes, your hair, the way you walk, the way you speak, exc... It can as big or as small as you wish it to be. It's up to you.   

Everyone loves gifts. That is one things that proves someone is loving you 100% You feel love and cared for when someone gives you a gift and tells you 'I love you'.Why wouldn't you treat yourself with something amazing from time to time ? You know that you deserve love, so why not get it. There is nothing bad it treating yourself with something you enjoy.  Treat yourself, love yourself.

Dear self,

I don't need to tell you how many times I've spoken of doing things for you, but never did. 

And I don't need to tell how many times I've believed that your not good enough.  You know that I love you for being this weirdly funy person. I love you for being someone who is able to be around people. To feel their touch, to heat their voice, to see their true divine spark. I love you for how you carry yourself throug the world, for the way you burst into laughter all the time. I love you for the way your hair falls when your not trying to make it perfect. I love you for being here with me. 

I Love you for giving me support and strenght. I love you for giving me opportuniti to experience this magic world and all that is of it. I choose to listen to you from now on. Choose to cherish you. I choose to appreciate you. I choose to love you. I choose to be you here and now!